Snow on the Mountains

Snow on the mountains in September. How is that even a possibility? Not even a week ago I woke up to see that the leaves on the trees had turned bright orange over night. The first day of Autumn isn't even until September 23. How could the mountains change from summer, to Fall, to winter in one week? How do I go from desiring a raspberry cream frappuccino to a cinnamon dulce milk steamer in one week? How do I go from shorts, and sandals to boots and pants overnight? How do I deal with summer ending so suddenly, and winter sweeping autumn away before it even had a chance to take a foothold? The homesickness I felt last night is spilling over into today. I have seven days until my Mom and Dad come to visit my kids and help me move into my new apartment. I hope that those seven days pass as fast as the last seven have.

Crickets and Rain

I never realized how home sick an open window could make me.

 I have crickets at home in Washington, but they are nothing compared to the crickets here in Utah. At home crickets mean summer and late night runs into the desert to look for falling stars that never seem to show up. Crickets mean 95 degrees at ten o'clock at night. Crickets mean hammocks and wind sweeping through the quaking aspens. But here, here they mean nothing. It is a raw empty place that is left inside my heart. Waiting to be filled with new memories.

I have rain at home in Washington. But it is nothing compared to the rain here in Utah. At home we have the smell of rain soaking the parched earth. We have the wind that brings in the storms that dump their much needed water on the farms. We have a settling of the ever present dust that always leaves your car dirty the day after a car wash. We have the cold rain of February and the warm rain of August. We have lightning and thunder that shake you to your bones. And then just like that it is gone. And for a few hours you can smell the green of growing things instead of the brown of dry earth. But here it is constant rain for two days. Here it is clouds that don't let the sun peek in. Here it is sad, and lonely, and frustrated.

Here crickets sing to each other as the rain drip, drip, drips from the sky. It is so strange to hear crickets chirping and rain falling at the same time. I fear I will never grow to love those two sounds together, because I love them so fiercely separately.

Please Stand and Sing

Yesterday our congregation was asked to stand and sing. As I stood and sang I felt my daughters arm link with mine. I looked down at her standing on the bench so she would be tall enough to see what everyone was standing to see. I laughed mid song and smiled down at the look of interest on her face. I remembered being her age and climbing up onto the bench and putting my own arm through my moms as the congregation stood to sing. I remember thinking why is everyone standing up? What are you all looking at?

We stood and sang together my girl and I. And then we sat together hand in hand for the rest of the service. I hope one day she will remember standing and singing with me as she stands and sings with her own children.